The Mid-journey Crisis

After a good start seems I’ve come to a complete stop. A bit like the M25, promises so much then no sooner you’re in top gear you’re hitting the breaks and then quickly milked of any optimism. So to get me going again I’m coming off the motorway and taking a diversion. A “mid-journey” crisis you might say…….. a bit like a mid-life crisis if I was looking for a metaphor. You know the best thing to do is stay put on the motorway, you know the jam will clear and you’ll be moving again shortly. But no, you’ve had enough, there must be more to life, there must be a better way so you fly down the clear slip road at the next junction and smile as you look at the other drivers who are thinking – I wish I had the balls to take a chance but I might get lost. You also catch the a glance of a smug looking bugger sitting in the slow lane who’s smiling and dishing out a knowing “you tosser, you’re gonna regret that sunshine” look. Bollocks to you I’m thinking.

It all starts so well. I’m feeling confident, unbeatable, I have a sense of freedom and I’m in control. I get to the roundabout at the end of the slip road …………. my sat nav is telling me to take the 5th exit back on to the motorway ……. that voice curiously now sounds like my mum … well not my mum, someone else’s mum…… my mum would be telling me about previous wrong turns and showing me the pictures. Back to the roundabout, I’ve got choices yes, great………. but I don’t understand any of them. Place names that I’ve never heard of road numbers that mean nothing to me. I know I’ll follow the guy in the Porsche who’s in front of me …….he didn’t get his Porsche taking the safe option, he knows where he’s going, he’s probably had many a mid-journey crisis. So off we go……… ‘do a u-turn in 100 yards’ barks mother. I turn her off, after all you don’t want your mum telling you what to do as you speed through the twists and turns of your new slimmer faster, better looking, b road. Oh yes we’re doing 55 I’m keeping up with Porsche guy. My wheels are screeching as we wind through the country roads my life is looking up. We’ve now been travelling for about 20 miles. I’m suddenly feeling a little anxious, I don’t recognise anything, and there are no big blue signs with familiar names, no matrix signs telling me to drive carefully, no hard shoulder in case of an emergency, no fellow M25 warriors for company.

Here I am out in the wilderness with the Porsche guy. Shit….. the traffic lights ahead change to red and Porcshe guy hits the accelerator and powers through – tosser. I can’t follow, i’ve not got the acceleration, my diesel engine is built for economy and safety and cruising on the motorway. Fuck …… I’m on my own.

What happened? I knew where I was going on the M25, alright it wasn’t exciting but it was safe and predictable. I knew my journey would take longer than I’d like, but I’d get there eventually.

So what do I do now ……. I turn mum back on……. “ take the next right and turn around”. I turn her off again, the lights change and I power ( I say power, I mean chug) ahead. I’ll not catch the Porsche guy, he’s probably a serial tosser anyway. But I’m not turning around I’m going to take in the scenery and meander down the country lane. I’m gonna be late, so what, I might even stop at a country pub for spot of lunch ……… who knows what might happen.

My advice……. if you feel you’re losing momentum don’t be afraid to take a different path, just keep sight of who you are. Don’t imitate others….. people will see right through that. Just like a great marketing strategy you need to surprise people occasionally, otherwise they’ll stop noticing you.


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